I recently had my first child, and soon after, my father died suddenly while I was still in my fourth trimester. My father was an atheist, and I have always searched for truth about what lies beyond this life. I remain equal parts skeptical and hopeful. After his death I made pinhole self-portraits exploring grief, yet the images were marked by the unplanned cross from my jewellery. It appeared in shifting sizes and positions I never arranged. No logical reason explained this, so I placed it in my box of evidence that something beyond exists. I hope my dad was present with me in the act of creating these pinhole images and maybe, in some way, he was.